I could go on for days, talking about the lack of self-love that is rampant in our society. It doesn't take more than a few moments of being in the company of a fellow human, to discern that their primary dissatisfaction with their life experience comes from this place. It always breaks my heart, because we are all PERFECT, but all of us have room for improvement. It is sometimes difficult to see what is beautiful about ourselves. I know this only too well from my own life story. As with every other Area of Understanding I discuss, this too is very fixable.
Let me give you something to start with.
It is a guided meditation that I strongly suggest you have someone read to you, or that you record it and listen to your own voice sharing these important words:
"First, make yourself comfortable.
Once you’re settled, close your eyes or soften your gaze and tune into your breath. Notice your breath, without trying to change it. And notice also if you feel tense or relaxed, without trying to change that either.
Inhale through your nose and then exhale through your mouth. Continue to take deep, full breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. As you breathe, become aware of the state of your body and the quality of your mind. Where is your body holding tension? Do you feel closed off or shut down emotionally? Where is your mind? Is it wandering or is it at home within the breath? Is your mind at ease or filled with restlessness, negativity, and doubt?
Place both hands over your heart and continue to inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Ask yourself: How does it feel to place my hands over this tender area, this place where I experience love for self and others?
Let your breath become more smooth and effortless and begin to breathe in and out through your nose. Feel the flow of air moving into your lungs and then back out into the world.
With each exhale, imagine you are releasing any negative thoughts that may be lingering in your mind.
Continue to focus on your breath. On each inhale, think “I am worthy,” and on each exhale, “I am enough.” Let each inhale draw in self-love and each exhale release what is no longer serving you. Take a few minutes to breathe and recite this mantra internally. Notice how you feel as you say these words to yourself.
If your mind wanders at any point, know that it’s okay. It’s the nature of the mind to wander. Simply bring your attention back to the breath. Notice how your thoughts come and go, whether positive or negative, and simply allow them to pass on by like clouds floating in the sky.
Now visualize yourself standing in front of a mirror and look into your own eyes. What do you see? Pain and sadness? Love and joy? Neutrality?
Regardless of what appears in the reflection, tell yourself: “I love you,” “You are beautiful,” and “You are worthy of happiness.” Know that what you see in the mirror in this moment may be different from what you see the next time you look.
Imagine now that you could breathe into your heart and visualize love pouring out of your hands and into your heart.
Let this love warm and permeate you from your heart center, filling the rest of your body.
Feel a sense of comfort and calm traveling up through your chest into your neck and head, out into your shoulders, arms, and hands, and then down into your ribs, belly, pelvis, legs, and feet.
Allow a sensation of warmth to fill you from head to toe. Breathe here and know that love is always available for you when you need it.
Take a few more deep, mindful breaths. Sit for a few moments to acknowledge the unique experience you had during this meditation. Refer back to this practice, or any other resource you may have, whenever you need to create a loving space for yourself. "
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